The Dreaded Heartthrob-With-Pornstache: History is full of
comical facial hair: muttonchops, the soul patch, the Tuff Man. But at
least those whiskers possessed a whisper of sex appeal. (Say what you will,
but muttonchops were hot, hot hot in the 1800s, and the "friendly
muttonchop," which linked the burns with the 'stache, is like a cozy cardigan
for the cheeks. Who doesn't get a little tingly over that?)
We cannot say the same about the pornstache, which littered the lips this
year of at least three of Hollywood's hottest hunks: Brad Pitt, Robert Downey Jr. and Orlando Bloom.
It also appeared on some sunken dreamboats, which only made matters worse for
their languishing allure.
We would never advocate violence, but we can certainly understand if someone
perpetuated a drive-by shaving. It's DEFCON 1 for the Mach 3.
(AP)
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