Meester Wrong:Leighton Meester is always so primly
and prettily put together as Blair Waldorf on "Gossip Girl," so we can only imagine how merciless the
Queen B would be in her assessment of this dress. She'd probably start with a
withering pop culture put-down, something like,... more "Didn't I see Tori Spelling wearing that to prom on 'Beverly Hills, 90210'? God, I love classic TV." Next
would come a more detailed sartorial disemboweling, along the lines of,
"Personally, I prefer laces on my sneakers, not my décolletage, and fishnets on
my legs, not hovering around them like an icky mesh force field." From there,
Blair would make quick work of the makeup ("Next time, try lips that say
cultured, not clownish.") and accessories ("Did you Bedazzle the bag and
bracelet yourself, or did Little J help you?"). At that point, Chuck Bass would
slime his way in, take one look at the LBDWUO (little black dress with
unappealing overlay) and demand that it be removed, preferably slowly and while
he flares his nostrils. And ... scene. Close
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