Stigmata

Could have been a classy thriller. But all the Aramaic in the world can't save it from its own pounding slickness.

Essentially a late-'90s MTV version of "The Exorcist," a half-serious, half-silly piece of business that keeps us involved despite (or maybe because of) being more than a little overdone.

Possibly the funniest movie ever made about Catholicism. It confuses the phenomenon of stigmata with satanic possession.

Begins with a scene of mass repentance, but the real sin here is a profligate waste of talent.

The scariest thing about this appalling and seemingly endless movie is that you paid for your ticket and now have to sit through it.

A leaden exercise in what can go wrong when movies attempt to explore mysterious forces with dated special effects and easy symbolism...a soggy mess.

Despite exposition delivered so redundantly and witlessly you think you're in a Kaplan class, Stigmata manages to be incoherent.

A vicious anti-Catholic diatribe disguised as an audition tape for MTV.

Save yourself from this mess.

(Patricia Arquette's) irritated reactions to her dire situation have all the force of a pet owner's whiny complaints when her feline refuses to use the cat box.