Don Cheadle
as Isaac the bartender in 'The Love Boat'
This is an easy one. Since Garry Marshall seems intent on destroying all the
cool holidays by creating lame giant ensemble romantic comedies around them, why
not just take on the ultimate giant ensemble romantic comedy? It ... morewould save
audiences from watching Sarah Jessica Parker, Ashton Kutcher, Jennifer Garner and 10,000 others
take on Halloween.
"The Love Boat." The name says it all. It's the second-most famous boat and
love combination after "Titanic," and we all know how that one ended.
The effortlessly charming Don Cheadle is perfect for Isaac the
bartender. Your captain would be Alan Arkin. Because most '70s shows
get a multicultural update for their new versions, how about reimagining Doc
with Queen Latifah? Gabourey Sidibe could
play her daughter/Julie the cruise director. The mother-daughter banter could be
priceless.
And since Ashton Kutcher seems contractually
obligated to appear in these things, he can play Ace, the cruise photographer
who showed up in the last few seasons. They could even tie it in to those camera
commercials Kutcher is always doing.
