Video: Ron Howard on 'Da Vinci'
Dish Diva: The 'Da Vinci' train

By Dave McCoy
MSN Movies

May 17, 2006

By now, you've most likely seen the trouncing "The Da Vinci Code" has received here in Cannes by the press. That story got worse following its premiere... but more of that in a minute. First, let's clear up some facts printed by numerous outlets following the film's first screening. History tells us that Cannes audiences can be brutally critical. They are known to boo, hiss and yes, even toss stuff at a screen following an unappetizing movie. And there are stories of how winners of the Palme d'Or were heckled following the prize announcement (David Lynch, can you confirm?). So, it probably came as no shock when you read about how "Da Vinci Code" was loudly jeered after the initial press screening. Only one problem: It never happened.

Now, trust me: I'm the last guy in the world to defend a Ron Howard movie. I once wrote that the "EdTV" auteur "signifies everything that is boring and wrong with Hollywood" and branded him "a director who makes safe, bland entertainment intended not to ruffle anyone's feathers." Oh, and I'm still pissed that "Backdraft" stole two hours of my life. But, people, let's get our facts straight.

Yes, it's true that the sold-out auditorium laughed when the film's big mystery was revealed — partially because you could see it coming for two reels, partially because the film takes itself so seriously that we were looking for any comic relief, but mostly because Tom Hanks' ultra-dramatic line reading was so, well, absurd. But the booing? It's now part of Cannes myth, but nope, never happened. Worse, the film ended and there was nothing but indifferent silence.

And honestly that is the appropriate response to "Da Vinci Code" (ok, perhaps a big yawn as well). For all of the religious controversy it's creating all over the world, what we've got here, folks, is one lifeless thriller that probably won't be remembered in six months. It's not bad, it's just... void. In fact, I'm met several people who left the screening early because of boredom.

Despite all the claims of heresy, Howard and company really take the safest route with their film. The movie offers up two suggestions -- Jesus was the son of God, or Jesus was a righteous dude with tons of charisma who gave great speeches but was married and had children (depending on your beliefs, both are radical suggestions). And then does the film take a stand on either concept? No. It's as safe and wishy-washy as its director.

But really that's not the problem with "Da Vinci Code."

Take away all the religion and the movie is supposed to be an entertaining thriller. It's very much in the same vein as "Raiders of the Lost Ark" (the mission in both? Find the Holy Grail). But "Raiders" had Indy and great action, set pieces and snakes. And "Da Vinci"? Well, it's got a very worried, yet bored-looking Tom Hanks as its center and one action sequence where "Amélie" (Audrey Tautou) drives a tiny French car backwards through oncoming traffic. Oh, and it's got exposition. Lots and lots and lots of exposition. If you removed the chunks of the movie where we watch characters tell historical stories and drone on and on about mythical theories, we'd be left with just the film's trailer. Howard, for his part, tries his best by framing these tales with imagined visual interpretations, but he's stuck. I haven't read the book, but friends tell me much of it takes place inside the heads of the main characters. And while that makes for interesting reading, it's a cinematic challenge that Howard isn't capable of making.

Now, the film isn't a total wash. Ian McKellen plays Leigh Teabing with an over-the-top aplomb that the film is otherwise lacking. When he's onscreen, the film comes alive. However, when he leaves, we're left with another 45 minutes and about three endings.

If the after party — held in an enormous, brash and brightly lit pyramid on the water — was any indication, perhaps the people involved with the film know the score. MSN Video and Dish Diva attended the gala expecting to find a parade of stars entering glamorously on a red carpet. But after standing around for hours, we found out that all the celebs were ushered in through the back door. Like the movie, McKellen saved the event briefly with a flamboyant appearance, but all in all, it wasn't the way you thought Cannes would kick off the festival. And the movie? "Da Vinci" rode into town on a wave of hype and controversy, but leaves in silence. Appropriately.

Sound of Silence

Speaking of silence, you get a whole lot of it in Chinese filmmaker Lou Ye's controversial "Summer Palace." The film is in competition for the Palme d'Or, despite the fact that the Chinese government hasn't approved it yet. It most likely is looking at a non-release in its own country because of sequences depicting the Teineman Square riots of the late '80s. And it might have a tough time finding art-house audiences around the globe; at nearly 150 minutes, "Summer Palace" is a tough sit, despite a ton of graphic sex and a stunning, absolutely naked (in every sense of the word) performance by lead actress Lei Hao (she's got to be an early frontrunner for the Best Actress Oscar).

The movie uses long, drawn-out silences to depict an exhausting, unhealthy 12-year, on-again, off-again relationship. For the first hour, mostly spent as the two lovers attend college, it's dazzling. But when the personal turns political and the lovers part ways, "Summer Palace" loses momentum. And worse, the silent suffering is replaced with the type of voiceover diary entries that haters of art-house cinema mock with glee. While challenging and brave, it, like the affair it chronicles, ultimately falls flat.

Come on, Cannes... let's pick it up!

A demain...

Dave McCoy is lead editor for MSN Movies.