(...Story Continued from Previous Page)
More conventionally, Wilson falls for the perfect girl (Rachel McAdams), loses her when his heartless M.O. is
exposed, then sinks so low he starts stalking funerals for sexual prey.
The W.P. Sez: Promiscuous wedding attendance (see also "Four Weddings and a Funeral") makes men out of Peter Pans. The
lovable lust-meisters in "Wedding Crashers" must first lose their testosterone-fueled
mojo in order to grow up and mate with females who are more than sexual
conveniences.
Your faithful Wedding Planner would be remiss if she didn't caution that, for
men, coming of age in wack-wedding-world often involves some symbolic
ball-breaking. This requisite rite of passage is uncomfortably referenced in "The Wedding Planner": strolling through the park with somebody
else's groom (eternally feckless Matthew McConaughey), Jennifer Lopez and her not-yet-ready-for-prime-time
soul mate break off, then struggle to glue back on, a statue's outstanding
"package."
For God's Sake, Elope!
And then there's Family and Friends, ostensibly ordinary people who
nonetheless go psychotic at the mention of marriage. Neurotic, autocratic,
sometimes homicidal -- these are only some of the adjectival extremes that
afflict mom and dad, sisters and brothers, best friends and former lovers when
they're exposed to wedding fever.
'Tis the season to unlock the crazy closet and let the bad/good times roll!
"My Big Fat Greek Wedding" posits an immigrant clan so benighted it
preaches that a woman was put on Earth "to marry a Greek man, to have Greek
babies and to feed everyone until the day she dies." When ugly duckling Toula
(Nia Vardalos) falls for a WASP (John Corbett) blessed by deeply beige parents, ethnic
hell erupts. Bride and groom-to-be fade into the background, to gape slack-jawed
at the self-serving antics of their mentally challenged relations. Designed to
warm our cockles with the delusion that love conquers all, even devouring
families, "My Big Fat Greek Wedding" could, with minor tinkering, be a great
horror movie.
In contrast, "Monsoon Wedding" is almost a Bollywood musical, reveling in the
sustaining embrace of family, but also exposing its unholy side: pedophilia's
the worm in the apple. There's mild culture clash between old-timers and cool
kids, but this celebration's a swirling kaleidoscope of vivid color, song, dance
and food we feel no shame in sharing. Even the arranged marriage between two
jilted lovers turns out to be surprisingly redemptive.
An unabashed celebration of ABBA tunes, "Mamma Mia!" uses nuptials on a Greek island as the
excuse for reunion and paternity tests, encouraging a trio of old rock 'n' roll
girlfriends (Meryl Streep, Christine Baranski, Julie Walters) to let down their hair big-time, and
inviting three aging hunks (Stellan Skarsgard, Pierce Brosnan, Colin Firth) to vie for belated
fatherhood. What eventuates is a sun-drenched orgy of rampant silliness, with
all the principals mugging, lip-syncing, and shaking their booties like a gaggle
of Disney dwarves on crack. Still, the sight of this communal case of St. Vitus'
Dance convinces the Wedding Planner that a sequel is in order: "Rocky Horror
Show: The Wedding."
Guests and family in "Rachel Getting Married" are so insistently
multiracial and PC-diverse, it looks like Rachel (Rosemarie DeWitt) has invited the United Nations to
witness her wedding. But it's her self-absorbed sister (Anne Hathaway), on recess from drug rehab and lugging
a load of guilt over her little brother's death, who nearly steals the bride's
show. Where better than a wedding to stage a no-holds-barred encounter group, a
chance for extreme therapy, as sisters, parents and friends strip down to the
nitty-gritty, exposing all their emotional owies?
The W.P. Sez: Know your ethnic origins and have your family
and guests vetted by a qualified psychiatrist before making wedding plans. Best
advice of all: Head for Vegas!
Choose Me!
Impending nuptials often dead-end in a Moment of Truth: with the finish line
in sight, the bride- or groom-to-be drops her/his guard and lets it all hang
out. Cold feet and bad behavior may ensue. Even worse, epiphany -- that
groom/bride should be mine! -- can come just at the moment the wedding leviathan
is about to swallow up some horribly mismatched couple. At the climax of "The Graduate," that realization famously fuels Dustin Hoffman's mad dash to the church where true
love Katharine Ross is marrying another guy.
Few ex-lovers go as ballistic on a Bride as David Carradine does in Quentin Tarantino's "Kill Bill." But Julia Roberts definitely flirts with her character's
dark side in "My Best Friend's Wedding." Tramping through the movie in
pantsuits, brandishing a blockbuster grin, her character, Julianne, goes up
against the giddy golden girl (Cameron Diaz) who's engaged to marry her lifelong
best bud (Dermot Mulroney), suddenly the object of Julianne's
single-minded desire. There's something coldly predatory in Julianne's attempts
to "kill" her rival, a sense of entitlement that mars the charm of this nuptial
comedy. Ironically, Julianne's gay pal (Rupert Everett, on a roll) so handily
runs off with the movie that he totally overshadows the dim bulb she's
desperately trying to turn on.
(Your Wedding Planner can't recommend the recent dud "Made of Honor," which recycled "My Best Friend's" plot with
gender roles reversed -- it's Patrick Dempsey who discovers love practically at the
altar, as his longtime gal pal is about to wed a Scottish hunk.)
Like the wedding-crashing characters played by Vaughn and Wilson, Robbie
Hart's "The Wedding Singer" brings on the happy at every nuptial event
he (Adam Sandler) works. Belting out '80s pop songs in
the worst way, deftly deflecting drunks and bullies, looking out for the kids,
the boy with the curly mullet's a surprisingly adorable nerd. A week before he's
to wed a slutty, big-haired Joisey girl, Robbie meets his perfect match in Drew Barrymore's wedding waitress, a sweet,
vulnerable soul engaged, inexplicably, to a womanizing clod. Like little kids
lost in an adult film, Sandler and Barrymore are Hansel and Gretel trying to
follow breadcrumbs back to the safety of each other's embrace.
The W.P. Sez: If you're emotionally stunted enough never to
have realized that what you feel for your friend-for-life might actually be Big
Love, don't mess with his/her wedding plans. Marking territory's not a firm
foundation for marriage.
Special nerd alert: Never ever get engaged to anyone who looks like the spawn
of Joe Piscopo.
Civil Unions
Even when the proceedings should be cut-and-dried, a matter of convenience
for all concerned, turns out there's no protection from the lethal love toxins
generated by the most perfunctory courthouse marriage or faking of "I do." Ain't
no cure for the wedding flu!
Peter Weir's "Green Card" opens with a wedding of convenience,
after which plant lady Andie MacDowell and French musician Gérard Depardieu part company with polite platitudes:
"Nice to meet you. Good luck with your life." The oafish Prince gets his green
card, the Sleeping Beauty a highly desirable Manhattan apartment with
spectacular solarium available only to married folk. But the Department of
Immigration forces a reunion, and soon the big, clumsy fellow who eats life as
though it were a ripe tomato has penetrated the lady's virginal retreat. "You
need a f---," the groom rightly but inelegantly advises the bride, a very long
time after they've been pronounced man and wife.
Halfway through Ang Lee's "The Wedding Banquet," mother and dad, respectively weeping and
stone-faced, witness their son's disappointingly dreary wedding in a New York
courthouse. What the parents who've come all the way from Taiwan for this most
important moment don't know is that the groom is gay. Or that his nice American
landlord is his longtime lover. Or that the bride harbors the forlorn hope that
the marriage will take.
"The Wedding Banquet" never treats family and tradition in shallowly negative
terms, but cherishes their anchoring value. Neither does the film turn this
marriage of convenience into high-camp farce. Everyone is smarter and more
flexible and more loving than predictable stereotypes would allow for. As the
old folks head down a long airport tunnel, heading home, they glance happily
back at their new son(s) and pregnant daughter-in-law, a trio "married" by
mutual respect and affection.
The W.P. Sez: With all due respect, Miss California, you
haven't got a clue about how many shapes and colors and sizes real marriage can
come in. Drop that cookie-cutter, girlfriend, and give wack weddings a chance!
Sound off: Comment on this story
Send us your thoughts on movie weddings. What is your favorite? The
worst? Writes us at heymsn@microsoft.com
Kathleen Murphy currently reviews films for Seattle's Queen Anne News and
writes essays on film for Steadycam magazine. A frequent speaker on film, Murphy
has contributed numerous essays to magazines (Film Comment, the Village Voice,
Film West, Newsweek-Japan), books ("Best American Movie Writing of 1998," "Women
and Cinema," "The Myth of the West") and Web sites (Amazon.com, Cinemania.com,
Reel.com). Once upon a time, in another life, she wrote speeches for Bill
Clinton, Jack Lemmon, Harrison Ford,
Joe Pesci, Robert De Niro, Art Garfunkel and
Diana Ross. |
Hotmail
