Posted Jan. 19, 2009

It remains to be seen whether congratulations or an intervention is in order for Joaquin Phoenix, who demonstrated his rap skills (yeah, you read that right -- rap) in Las Vegas on Friday night, about two months after he announced he was retiring from acting to pursue his music dreams.

Joaquin Phoenix channels Jerry Garcia and a latter-day Jim Morrison with decidedly mixed results. (©Retna Ltd.) More photos of Joaquin

"This is me saying this is who I am. This is my story," he told People just shortly before he climbed onstage at hot spot LAVO wearing an ensemble presumably scrounged from the bottom of Oscar the Grouch's trash can and sporting a beard so unkempt even Hagrid would suggest a trim. "After all the years of reading scripts and reading lines, this is my chance to do something straight from the heart and put it out there."

As for his decision to express himself freestyle, Phoenix says, "When I was young, I liked punk rock music, but then I discovered rap. I love the storytelling aspect of hip-hop."

On hand to document what was either the finest piece of performance art since Sacha Baron Cohen slipped on a neon green suspender-thong as Borat or the biggest cry for help since Britney Spears buzzed her noggin was Joaquin's brother-in-law Casey Affleck (he's married to Joaquin's sister Summer), who is filming a documentary about his U-turn into music.

The Oscar-nominated "Walk the Line" actor, 34, performed three songs during the short set (check out a snippet of his not-so-mad skills here), which ended with him taking a header off the stage.

While his stumble is hardly a positive sign, at least he landed safely on a banquette, a feat OK! magazine says he marked by "dancing around and jumping up and down so hard his beanie flew off."

Perhaps he was excited because his expectations for the performance were so low.

How low?

Joaquin says "bye good" to acting back in October. (©Reuters)

Phoenix, who remains irritated by suggestions that his abandonment of the big screen and current career trajectory are a put-on, is just happy not to have hard objects tossed at his hirsute mug.

"I went to this club and got thrown off by the DJ who was [bleeping] with me," he reveals to the Las Vegas Review-Journal. "Mother[bleepers] threw ice at me. So I think that I'm [bleeping] willing to do it. And are there people that are gonna say that it's a joke? Yeah. Are there people that's gonna say that I suck? Probably. I can't control that."

Maintains Joaquin, whose in-the-works album is being produced by Diddy, "All I can do is be who I am. I run that same [bleeping] risk every movie I do. I feel like the other actors are going, 'This dude sucks. This is a [bleeping] joke.' You know what I mean?"

Yes, we know what you mean, even when you attempt to paraphrase Scripture.

"It's not about you. It's not about them," he continues. "If I was thinking about other people, I never would have gone anywhere. As Jesus said: They say this and that; you don't listen to them. It's not about what they say. And I have to be true to myself. I don't know."

On the plus side, Phoenix, who stuck around after his show greeting fans, posing for pictures and hanging with friends, is self-aware enough to recognize his own fickleness.

"You might see me in a week, and I've retired from [bleeping] music and I can't hack it. I don't know, dude," he laughs to the Review-Journal. "But I'm gonna put myself out there."