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All right, little girls, listen up. I am not down with the Jonas Brothers. Sorry. Call me old. Call me out of touch. Or, you know, call me a person with good taste in music. But I'm indifferent to their tunes, annoyed with their lifestyle (Come on kids! You're young! Carpe diem!), and slightly grossed out by their mass-marketed, slickly packaged, goody-goody image. That being said, I do not begrudge any youngster digging these boys, since teen-idol-dom has been around since the bobby-soxers. (But then, ahem, that was in regard to Frank Sinatra, who was, you know, a genius interpreter of song; and, of course, Elvis Presley, who was, let's see, brilliant, and the King.)

But before you call me a Jonas snob, I want to assure you that I am not a snob in regard to bubblegum pop music. I like Britney Spears (I even like "Gimme More"  OK?). I have a soft spot for that Christina Aguilera song "Beautiful," and I'm trying really hard to see the appeal of Miley Cyrus. And then there are the past hotties of yore: the Bobby Shermans, the David Cassidys, the Donny Osmonds, etc. So as we ready for the release of the boys' 3-D concert ("Jonas Brothers: The 3D Concert Experience"), I'm looking back at my favorite pop music movie, "Head," starring those guys who I hoped and prayed were "walking down my street": the Monkees.

My curmudgeonly manner might make me seem older than I am. But, really, my sister and I became almost obsessed with the Monkees when Nickelodeon was rerunning all of their shows in the 1980s. So, again, I understand you Jonas-loving kids because, if you ask me about the Monkees, I become immediately defensive: "They weren't just a joke!" "They could play their own instruments!" They wrote some of their own songs!" "Mike Nesmith rules!" will pop from my mouth to slack-jawed stares. But, please, just look at who worked with the Monkees: Jack Nitzsche, Neil Diamond, Boyce and Hart, and then some.

So the Monkees had some major guts when they made the 1968 counterculture movie "Head" with director Bob Rafelson and writer/producer Jack Nicholson (um, that is completely awesome, like Vincent Gallo producing a Jonas Brothers movie). The movie begins with quite a bang. The opening sequence shows the boys being chased, Beatle-mania style, by a mob of screaming girls, only to jump off a bridge in group suicide. And then there are the anti-war bits. And the make-out sessions. And the Frank Zappa cameo. And the general drugged-up weirdness. Sure it was the 1960s, but for a manufactured band created for television, this was quite something. Something the Jonas Brothers would never even attempt to achieve (as far as I know; I'm willing to give them time). A funny, shrewd deconstruction of Monkees mania, the movie is a delightful curio with its chief highlight being the underwater gorgeousness of "Porpoise Song," one of the Monkees' most impressive and haunting compositions. To me, this is the ultimate bubblegum, boy band movie, and for that matter the ultimate boy band, with terrific songs like "(I'm Not Your) Steppin' Stone," "I'm a Believer," "Star Collector," "Mary, Mary," "Circle Sky," and so many more.

So, for a moment, children, forget the Jonas and remember the Monkees. I assure you, if you hop aboard the "Last Train to Clarksville" you'll have a favorite. Who is mine? It should be Mike Nesmith, but alas, I was always in love with Micky Dolenz. I can't even tell you which Jonas brother is which. Maybe one of them needs to wear a stocking cap.

"Jonas Brothers: The 3D Concert Experience" opens in wide release on Feb. 27.